The Wedding Hi-Jacker

There seems to always be the well-intending, lovely, gregarious guest, be it family or friend. Who shifts their role mid-stream from being a “Guest of the Wedding” to “The Wedding Hi-Jacker”.

We’ve all heard horror stories or experienced that person. Their presence is recalled with nervous laughter and gasps of “oh yeah, remember so and so…”

And we could bullet point copious sentences about them, but we’ve all read those before. I’ll spare you the retelling of the same tales told with different names.

What I will do is give you a bullet point list to keep you from being that person.    “The Wedding Hi-Jacker.”

Usually, Hi-Jackers are completely unconscious of the fact that their help/humor  is not really desired, and generally not needed.  In actuality, they have quickly become the “Guy That Ruined My Wedding” or the anecdotal “Thing That Went Wrong.”

So, to all of the Guests and Vendors attending the wedding, while we deeply appreciate your earnest efforts – um,  we beseech you to allow the Wedding Team that’s been hired to produce the Bride and Groom’s dream wedding to do what they do best…and we promise we’ll ask for your help the second we need it.  Promise! 

Without further ado, here’s our list of “How not to be that Guy” at the next wedding you attend:

1.  Bridesmaid-Maid of Horror (er um, we mean honor)

• This is an honored position.  We understand that you’re close to the bride and may even be her sister or best-est friend. We get that you’re excited and want her to have the most Perfect Day Ever.  We are thrilled you are here as the MOH!  We actually want your help a lot, but subject to some clauses;

i. Clause A: Unless you are specifically asked to do something; assume that all things are well taken care of and get yourself a cocktail.  Someone has been hired and paid to produce the event, and they have spent hundreds of hours coordinating details and lining up vendors and logistics.  So, please, No Thank You.  Please don’t “help”.

 ii. Clause A Sub-part B: (for Bride) 
As you will stress out the Bride, which will upset the groom and cause a whole lot of back whispers and resentment that you were even asked to be the MOH.  Don’t be that MOH.   Besides, really, do you need to have your say on the Brides wedding day?  Please, please go with the flow.  If you are asked to assist, or feel the need to share, ask yourself:  Am I serving my friends or am I imposing my personal opinion?  Am I contributing to the current plan or causing additional stress and work on the professionals and bridal couple?   If you still feel a “Hell Yes, I need to say/do something!”, then kindly pull aside the coordinator and let them know your concerns, then let them facilitate it.

So we encourage you to please, enjoy the honor, enjoy the day! Trust the chosen professionals.

2.  That Helping Guest

• First, we’d like to thank you for sharing all your experience when you helped with that gorgeous wedding ‘back home’ last year.  We think it’s lovely that you help at all your friends’ “kids” weddings.  We understand that you are a close friend of the family. Thank you for your tips and support.  And we do appreciate feedback, it is actually useful.  However: 
  Clause B: See Clause A 
  And it is appreciated that you came “early” to help out.  But, please, enjoy the scenery, your in Belize! We got this…and since we know you’re there to help, we’ll be sure to ask as soon as something comes up!

3.  The Professional

• We respectfully acknowledge that you’ve been doing this for longer than we’ve been alive.  That you have a high end business back home and that you would love to share all the details of your last successful event.  Your personal touch and expertise are probably stellar.  And again, we do appreciate your desire to step in”and sort us out”.  However 
  Clause C: See Clause A 
  As professional to professional, Thank you.  We know your seeing through different eyes.  Please, be a great guest, have a cocktail, enjoy being on the receiving end for a change!  

4. The “Let’s get this Party Going:” guest

• Often, the Best Man or another guest may be asked to keep an eye out and make sure that everyone is having a blast.  Heck, “that guy” usually doesn’t need to be asked, it’s who he is and what he does.  He’s the Life of The Party.  He’s Fun.  
   
  Until he ruins your wedding by deciding that RIGHT NOW he should bust out a cool dance move – right in the path as they are carrying out the 5 tier wedding cake.  When asked to be “that guy” we appreciate you stepping into your requested assignment with grace and respect.  We love that you don’t insist on the DJ playing the songs you want to hear despite the specific playlist selected by the Bride and Groom.   In advance, we Thank you for not making random toasts and requests on the Bride and Groom to perform embarrassing stunts to loosen everyone up.  And in the interest of ramping things up, thank you for not assisting the Bartender with serving more of those delicious Rum shots, to the point of exhausting repeat.  The bride and groom are so grateful that you didn’t bring your new “fun” friends you met at the bar on the beach last night.  And finally, thank you for curbing the desire to invite  all the guests  to follow YOU to the next hot party even though the wedding isn’t even over yet.  However: 
  Clause D: Don’t go there… be smart and plan your ramp up.  We will help you! 
  The Bride and Groom extend their heartfelt Thank you’s as well…

5. The Proud Parents

• This is the most wonderful day for you, Mom and Dad, and you want everything just perfect for your “punkin“.  Nothing makes our hearts more open than experiencing that special awe parents have of their children on their wedding day… 
  We respect and understand  that you want everything perfectly special for the beaming couple.  That is what we do.  However: 
  Clause E:  This really is their wedding day, not yours.  The most beautiful wedding gift you can give (besides the check if your paying for it), is allowing them to have their day.  Allow us to do our Job, we excel at it and if you don’t quite understand, See Clause A. 
  We know it may be challenging.  We appreciate your helpful hints and direction.  We love that you are present to capture all those special moments.  We love it when you let us be the professionals and communicate with the Bride and Groom.  Your presence is honored and cherished.  And we promise to take care of them with the utmost care and specialness. 
  Thanks Mom & Dad

We apologize if we missed any particular scenario.  We hope you enjoyed our list of “How Not To Be That Guy” or AKA “The Wedding Hi-Jacker.”  It’s not personal, just essentials of how to be the perfect wedding guest.  That will be our next post! 
 
The wedding day is a very beautiful moment in the lives of your friends.  We expect you the guests to bask in joy and fun celebration of the Wedding Couple. What we do is very important.  It’s our responsibility to make sure everyone has the experience of their life, especially the Bride and Groom.  We know you feel us.
So we look forward to seeing you for your Special Occasion and toasting you with a Watermelon Rum Cocktail…

Because “that’s how we do it over here at Romantic Travel Belize”!

Lara and Team